KINDness Begins With You
Lindsay Helm is an author and public speaker, whose first book about stepping into her true self releases at the end of October.
Vixen is a memoir where Lindsay shares about how she stepped into living her most authentic life. For her, this meant leaving a church community to change the way she practices her spirituality, which required a leap of faith into an unknown world.
"I am passionate about living boldly and loving big," says Lindsay. "My focus is on living an authentic life and helping others do the same."
Her professional career has taken her down many different roads in life, to include non-profit work, program development for children with special needs, public education, experience as a magazine editor and executive director for Teen Creative. But of all these roles, she is most proud to be a well-loved wife and mother to her 7-year-old son.
As a young child, Lindsay had a deep awareness and longing to find her faith. She felt connected to a bigger picture, but couldn't quite put her finger on what that meant. In her teens she joined an orthodox church that gave her some really beautiful things in life, but after her son was born she felt her self-awareness and awareness of her faith deepen. She began to question things on a deeper level.
Lindsay began to realize that her faith was changing, just as she was changing as a woman with her new role as a mother. This is when she began to deconstruct her faith, which sent her on a journey of true authentic wonder without bounds. Through this new awakening she began to practice her faith by trusting her heart and soul.
"It was painful and overwhelmingly joyful all at once," says Lindsay. "This decision caused me to lose friends, and ultimately an entire religious community that I had loved for a decade. But in the end, I was true to myself and I am a better person because of it."
Lindsay believes bravery is not one thing in particular, but how we show up in our everyday lives. Bravery is ordinary. It is speaking in front of your team at a meeting even though you don't want to. It is talking to a loved one after an argument. It is asking for time off so you can make your child's soccer game. It is signing up for an art class just because you want to. Bravery is in the everyday lived moments, and Lindsay believes we don't give ourselves enough credit for that.
"We are brave when we ask for things we want or need," Lindsay says. "We are brave when we speak up. We are brave when we show up. And most of all, we are brave when we let others see our true, authentic selves. Never let fear control your life. Ever. Instead, let the fear propel you into something new, big or daring. Allow the fear to be your guiding light and stop giving it the power to hold you back."
Lindsays says that writing her book helped her to explore the unhealed trauma that still plagues her heart and soul. She is a huge advocate for mental health and talk therapy, and even though she takes care of her mental health and has done a lot of therapy, she found that she still had some unresolved trauma that showed up as she was writing. She said it was welcomed because it helped her pin point the areas that needed further healing, and it also sparked some really beautiful discussions between her and her husband.
Another important thing she also learned during this time was how important it was that she remained KIND to herself through the process. And to allow herself the space to both feel and process the emotions that showed up. "If my experience has taught me anything, it is that you never know what someone is going through," says Lindsay. "So, always be kind!"
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In her case, this meant standing up to a police system that had failed to respect her rights of safety from sexual harassment and assault. As she was told it would be impossible to win her court case, she chose to bravely walk into the darkness to shed light on this grave injustice.
"I am not my injury,” she says. “I am not what happened to me. But I am the hero I need to be to survive and thrive, and with that I am able to love myself more than I ever could have imagined. I strive to always see the beauty in all of us. Our weaknesses can become our superpowers if we learn to master them.”
Even though Kristin already knew it in her heart that her son was affected by autism, it didn’t make it any easier to accept. She says it took her and her husband a few months to process what it meant for their son’s future.
Sometimes, the only thing that gets you through your day is pure FAITH. FAITH in yourself, FAITH in your partner, and FAITH that you are not failing your child.